50. things to my younger self (2/5)

Category: Career and Purpose

11-20. 

Things about career and purpose that
I wish I could tell my younger self

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Looking back after 20 years of experience of working with people, this is what I would tell myself:

11. People are not mean, sometimes they just do not know any better.​
It will be very tempting to think of someone as an *** or any other word especially when emotions run high. When time passes and you look back, you might see they did not know any better. This is not an excuse for bad behaviour. But it is a reminder we may have done something similar to someone else.

12. You are capable of achieving great things. Do not small yourself.
As a girl, this world - especially the corporate world - will continuously tell you where your place is. It will do it overtly, sometimes you will not even notice you are being played and manipulated into a stereotype. You will be punished for not playing a genre role, for trying to break a mold. Don’t you dare be discouraged.

13. Before you seek validation from anyone else, grow it within you.
This one cuts deep and it is something you will hear all the time. But only because it is actually true. People around you may celebrate your achievements and hold space for your accomplishments, but your greatest validation must always come from within. This is the only reliable and healthy place to grow it.

14. There are times to work really hard, and there are times to rest.
And they may not be when you plan them. You will have 12-14 hour working days for months, you will be exhausted and pushed to your limits, and a part of you will enjoy this. Because you are making progress. But there will also be times that you simply must rest and surrender. And that will be much harder than working 12 hours.

15. Underneath the titles, everyone is just a human being on their own little journey.
The more you grow professionally and meet people with greater power, greater influence, greater titles and responsibilities… If you take time to truly connect with them, you will see in a beautiful way, just another human on their little journey. No one has it all figured out. I repeat, no one.

16. Underneath the titles, everyone is just trying to do the best they can with what they know.  A title is not an equivalent to being a good human being. People who lead people are only as good at that as they are with themselves. May sound a little harsh, but it applies to us as well. We will not be a good leader or manager, unless we do the inner work.

17. People will treat you better if deep down you know your value calmly.
When you know deep down inside your value and your worth, you will not have to defend it. This will put you at ease in negotiations, this will put you at ease in difficult conversations and you will be able to get a far better outcome for yourself.

18. Money is important. Do not let people tell you otherwise. But also, do not make it the center of your life.
Your salary is important. There will be people who will try to get you to do tasks, projects under the pretext that money is not important. Just know that when it comes to negotiating the pay for your work - it is up to you to decide if money is important or it is not.

19. You will make more money if you treat money with respect. Just like people, money also likes to be appreciated.
There is a difference between holding money hostage and being respectful. Just as there is a difference between letting money slip too easily and spending it respectfully. Learn the difference early.

 20. Be open to life giving you not the job you want, but something even better.
Often you will be absolutely sure this is the perfect job for you, just to find out a few months later that something even better came along. Much like other things in life, the process of job searching is also a way for us to tune into what we really, really want without knowing it.
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        50 things about work that I wish I could tell my younger self... (21-30)