50. things to my younger self... (4/5)

Category: Career and Purpose

31-40. 

​Things about career and purpose that
​I wish I could tell my younger self.

Now looking back after 20 years of working with people, this is what I would tell myself:
​
31. Learn to become your greatest cheerleader! Sometimes that is the only person you will have by the sideline.
The main topic in coaching sessions is - I am not sure I have what it takes or I do not know if I can achieve what I want. And although a coach very often can help with some practical approaches and tips, the most impactful thing a good coach brings to a transformation is seeing the potential for that person and holding that possibility for them until they reach it. So learn to be your own cheerleader. To believe in your capabilities and in your potential, way before anyone else has done so. Learn to support yourself, to celebrate yourself and be your best friend truly.

32. You will have this one really, really good manager. Only then you will realise how average everyone before them was.
Sometime in your career, you are bound to meet a manager that will make you realise what it actually means to be working with a good leader. Appreciate this time, because unfortunately the corporate world does not tolerate truly good managers for too long. They all eventually leave. But that time you got to experience the impact of a good working environment, transparent and honest conversations and the greatness of being appreciated, will have an immense effect on the person you will want to become. It takes one really good manager for us to want to become one as well.

33. Staying for a long time in a company is not a measure of success.
Here is one thing that is quite fascinating in organisations - they all have ways of celebrating loyalty and seniority. While this is an important quality, make sure you do not equate it with success.
People have many different reasons to stay or to leave a place.The recognition we get is in the people who speak highly of us in our absence and in the integrity we have built with ourselves.

34. When a job or a place is not for you, you will know it. 
So often you will know deep down in your heart and soul that this is not your path, not your career, not your life to live. And so many of us choose to ignore that nudge. I have had sessions with architects that dislike what they do, executives that are tired of their work - and yet, we are so creative in finding the reasons to continue down the path we know. It is often an unexplainable nudge, a deeper intuitive message. But when a path is not for us, we know it. And choosing to ignore it is costly in the long run.

35. Please remember to have FUN! As you go through life, you will see the world is full of people who have been so busy growing up and playing the role of the adult, that they have forgotten how to have fun. And it is truly a tragedy. Because creativity and purpose, and all the things we are searching for when we search for a meaning in our career, can only be found in connecting with one thing - joy.
Allow yourself to be stupid. Allow yourself to be silly. Sometimes this is the best therapy.

36. Bring your whole self. Hiding parts of ourselves is a price too high to pay for any salary.
Once you start a job, it will be tempting to squeeze yourself into a job description. Not only that, but there will be others’ expectations to meet and projections you will face. Do not try to fit into expectations. It will take some calm courage and you can be down to earth about the process, but before starting a new role or at a new place - check in with yourself. There is no need to hide or to be ashamed of any parts of you. There will be a learning curve. Own that.

37. Value your time. And that of others.
Treat your time with the respect it deserves. Show up on time and expect that others do so as well. This one will be so difficult - but create time for yourself even on the busiest of days.
The hardest boundary you may need to keep is with yourself.

38. Performance evaluations are not as objective as we believe them to be. Take what resonates, leave what does not. People love giving their opinion. And often the word feedback is used to replace that concept, it does not make it in any way the full truth. Performance evaluations are often not as useful or helpful to personal development as organisations want to believe they are. Now, that said - there might be useful nuggets. Do not be too arrogant to dismiss them - there might be something that is hard to admit but that will be of service and benefit to you. Oh, should you decide to take that forward - make sure you do it for you, not so that you can fit someone's perception.

39. When you write yearly goals at work, write some just for yourself.
For years I did not understand the value of setting my own goals and intentions. Everything I had set was for the benefit of the organisation I was working with. And it took me years to realise how important it is to set up some personal career goals. I remember after a few years of working on these really ambitious goals at work that seemed impossible at the beginning of the year - I wondered how it is possible that we did reach them after all. And it is as simple as that - you write it down, and you start taking action, every single day. Not succeeding was not an option. And it made me wonder - why was I willing to do that for an organisation but not for myself?

 40. Learn to say ‘no’. In a kind way and before it is too late.
Turning down suggestions, opportunities and requests is a skill. And no one teaches us that. So learn how to politely and kindly say no - at an early stage. It is easier then, and also gives people time to find other options, if you are not available.


     50 things about work that I wish I could tell my younger self... (41-50)